A Heuristic Inquiry into the Experience of Feeling Unwanted at Birth

Abstract

Significant research has been committed to studying the mental and physiological effects and repercussions of being unwanted in children who were raised with surrogates or adoptive parents. Very little inquiry has been dedicated to studying the long term effects on children unwanted by one or both biological parents. This heuristic study employs a depth psychological and somatic approach to explore the lived experiences of this unique population of individuals who are now adults. It exposes how this desensitized environmental upbringing affected their self-perception long into adulthood. Being unwanted was also evident in their choices, their actions, and their views toward others. This qualitative study analyzed the experiences of 7 participants—4 women and 3 men—who were self-described as being unwanted at birth and includes the researcher’s personal association with the topic. Although the sample size was small, there were many significant similarities in the internalized feelings and perceptions of the participants that warrant further research. Further, this research suggests strategies that might mitigate the lifelong effects of being unwanted at birth.